Playing Dead
by DropItLikeMiley
Summary: "Since you're all assembled and probably feeling somewhat bad – I guess about being left behind – I wanted to tell you some things about life I really liked – back when living was "in.""
1. PROLOGUE

"_Dead is the new alive" I know what you're thinking… I was just being trendy. After all, more and more people seem to be doing it and I was always one to keep up with the current fashions. But this one is really cool. Trust me. And mark my words; it won't be long before all of you start to follow my lead.  
__Now I'm not knocking life – "life is good" as the rather expensive t-shirts which are always over priced would have said. Have you noticed that t-shirts with sarcastic and opinionated statements cost a lot less than the ones with deep quotes on them? I may be dead, but I still like a bargain, so I'd take a "Cool story bro" t-shirt over the "Life is Good" one any day.  
__But I digress. Since you're all assembled and probably feeling somewhat bad – I guess about being left behind – I wanted to tell you some things about life I really liked – back when living was "in."_

"What is this?" I frowned, paused the tape and looked at the others who were all sat in silence, stunned at what we were witnessing.

"It's Katie…" Louis said with a monotone voice, his eyes glued to the old, chunky TV in my bedroom. I'd had it since I was little and never thought of getting a new one as times changed and DVD and BlueRay came into fashion. Good thing I hadn't or we wouldn't have been able to watch this VCR.

"No shit!" Harry chucked something at Louis' head.

"Ouch, that hurt!"  
"Stop it guys," I sighed and pressed the "play" button on my television.

"_Rainbows. I'm not sure whether I'll be able to see them when I leave. You know, people always say rainbows are the bridge between heaven and earth but I never believed any of that bullshit. Again, that's all deep and inspiring and I like sarcasm." _I looked at Bexwho was chuckling to herself, typical Katie.

"_People take rainbows for granted but I don't, they make me smile… or made… whatever. They remind me of you. Remember? We sat in the field that one day, in the rain. It cleared up though and one appeared… Who am I kidding? You probably don't even care." _I felt everyone glance at Harry and he cleared his throat, we all quickly fixated our eyes on to the screen.  
"_Madonna. Call me old fashioned, but I loved to jam out in the car with Bex and Helen to Like A Virgin or…" _Louis burst out laughing "SHE SAID VIRGIN HAHAHAHA!" I shot a glare at him as the tape carried on.

"_Anyway, you're probably sat in Helen's room watching this seeing as she's the one with the VCR. Louis, you're on the scruffy old beanbag, Bex will be squished up to Niall at the end of Helen's bed against the wall… get a room guys, seriously, stop touching each other. I may be dead but I can still see what you guys are doing!" _They went bright red and all of us started laughing at them, she was right, that's exactly what they were like!

"_Why am I watching this? You ask yourselves. Well I want to tell you all about how I died."_


	2. Chapter 1

**BUZZZ BUZZZ BUZZZ.**

I groaned and rolled over, reaching out to my bedside table and struggled to find my phone in the dark. The bright light pretty much blinded me and I noticed I had a new message. I switched my lamp on and sat up in my bed. I couldn't believe what I had just read; I quickly shot out of my bed dropping my phone and started to change out of my pyjamas.

"Where did she go when you guys left her?" Harry puffed jogging over to Bex, Sophie, Ayesha and I.  
"I- I don't know, she said she was going home, I thought that it'd be okay, she said she didn't need us to walk wi-" Bex panicked, letting the words rush out of her mouth.  
"You let her go by herself? At 1 am? Here? In the dark? Are you stupid?" Harry yelled in Bex's face.  
"Hey, it wasn't her fault... it was all of us. Calm the fuck down Harry, she'll be fine. Chill your beans" Sophie rolled her eyes. She never really liked Katie. Well, thats a lie... she never really liked any of us but she had to be part of our group because of him, her boyfriend and our best friend.  
"Calm down? CALM DOWN? Katie's gone missing and you expect me to be calm?" Harry shoved passed us.  
"Where are you going?" I frowned and asked after him.  
"Where do you think? I'm going to look for her!" I looked over at Louis, Zayn and Niall - their faces were blank, white. They looked like they were about to throw up. I noticed Liam wasn't with them, that was strange... he followed them everywhere, normally. He was sort of like their shadow. Maybe he had had enough. "Are you coming or not?" He turned around and practically spat at us.  
"Yes" we all said in unison.

* * *

_"You see, life is good but just not good enough for me. I want adventure, I want fun... it wasn't fun anymore. You know what? I don't even think I'll die, I'll still be alive. Hey, look behind you." _ I paused the tape._  
_Everyone did what the friendly, familiar face in the tape told us to do. We looked behind us. My eyes searched for something, I don't know what they were searching for but then I noticed something in the corner, sticking out from behind my desk. It was a small parcel... I'd never noticed it before. This was creepy. Surely it couldn't have just appeared out of nowhere?  
"What's that?" Zayn asked curiously. I shrugged. "Well go and open it then," Harry sighed.  
I slowly got up and picked up the parcel, it had a label on it.

**To Bex... inside you'll find something that I hope is of great use to you. Your friend, Katie.**

"Bex" I stared at the parcel, not moving to look at anyone or anything. "Yeah?" She replied.  
"Its for you" I turned around and handed her it. Everyone looked at Bex with blank expressions. She took a deep breath and slowly began removing the packaging. Inside was a small, black box. It looked like a box you'd keep jewellery in. Jewellery? Why would Katie be giving Bex jewellery?  
"Go on" Niall put his arm around her, reassuring her. She lifted the lid off carefully, it was Katie's lucky ballet pump necklace.  
"Why would she give you that?" Harry frowned, "Shouldn't that be given to her sister, surely? It's too special" he rolled his eyes.  
"Don't be so rude," I dug my elbow into his stomach and played the tape again.

_"Bex, I know you want to be a dancer and you know what? You should do it. Its your passion and you're so talented... I want you to have this, it brought me luck so hopefully it will bring you some too. Eur, what am I saying? This is far too cringey for me." _I rolled my eyes and laughed. She's right, she's never like this... I mean never was. Everybody knows Katie was the dancer out of us all but so was Bex. She was always in the background though, she never really made a fuss and never auditioned for things in high school or anything. That was Katie's role.

* * *

Harry's face looked emotionally drained, you know, when someone doesn't know what to feel anymore, like they were numb? Yeah, that's what it was like. He sat there, motionless. I walked to the sofa and sat next to him. We were in his living room, around us were pictures, memories. "You okay?" I asked him. Stupid question, I knew the answer to that, of course he wasn't okay.  
"I will be, I suppose" he sighed, staring into space. I placed my hand on his knee, "I know it's hard, it's not going to get better for a long time but she's not going to want us to sit here all solemn, is she?" He shook his head slowly and looked at me, tears filled his eyes. I was trying my best to keep my emotions in for him, it was hard enough as it is but now he was bubbling, it was even harder.  
"I loved her."  
"You loved her?" I heard someone spit from the doorway of the living room. I turned around and looked at her - Sophie.

* * *

_"__Why am I watching this? You ask yourselves. Well I want to tell you all about how I died."_ A chill passed through the room and everyone looked at eachother. So, she knew exactly how she was going to die? It was by choice? All of this was too much. I thought she was murdered, that's what we all thought.  
_"You're probably wondering why I'm so cool about this whole thing. Well you know, everyone has to die one day and lots of people are doing it nowadays. Of course, being trendy isn't my main priority, there are other reasons behind this too. One of them being I know you all will join me sometime. It could be tomorrow, it could be in 10 years... it could even be tonight." _Louis gulped dramatically, trying to ease the eeriness of what we were watching. "Stop it Louis, you're not funny" Ayesha finally spoke.  
_"Of course you'll be joining me, I'm a trendsetter amn't I?"_ A smirk appeared on her face as she spoke those words. _"You'll be following in my footsteps soon enough... literally."_


	3. Chapter 2

"It's bloody freezing," Sophie groaned as we all marched along the leaf covered track within the forest near our homes. "Oh stop moaning, we're trying to find our friend, imagine how she's feeling right now?" Zayn snapped at her. She scoffed, "She's probably not feeling anything at all."  
Harry glared at her, "What's that supposed to mean?"  
"You know what I mean, " she smirked, "Anyway, why are you so bothered? She's just another attention seeking runaway, isn't she?" I couldn't believe this girl, how could Harry be so shallow to actually like her? Sure, she was a beautiful girl; long, golden hair, olive skin, blue eyes - but her personality was dire, she wasn't kind hearted in the slightest.  
"You cunt," Bex pretty much spat at her, "you better hope and pray we find her after saying that!"  
"Don't worry, we won't" she smiled "sweetly".  
"G-Guys..." Niall whispered, "look" he barely even got it out. I followed his stare. Oh my god.

* * *

___"You'll be following in my footsteps soon enough... literally."_  
I frowned, what did she mean? I'm sure none of us wanted to follow in her footsteps. Her death seemed brutal, cruel, nobody should ever have to go through it. I shouldn't really go into detail but let me tell you one thing; whoever did this to her was definitely not safe if they were ever found out. Katie's friends adored her, they'd do anything to protect her..Harry especially and now since we couldn't, I guess we'd have to do the next best thing; get justice.  
I looked around the room, everyone had the same expression; coldness. You know when someone's face is drowned from colour and filled with fear. I noticed that Liam was not with us... yet again. This was strange, whenever something involving Katie's disappearance came up, he never was around. Maybe it was just a coincidence but considering what she just told us on the tape, I wasn't taking this lightly. I spoke up "Guys, where's Liam?" They all shrugged. I got up and switched the power off on my old telly. "Hey... we were watching that!" Niall sulked. "We can finish it later, we need to find Liam."  
"Calm down, you're acting as if he's gone missing" Ayesha laughed.  
"Maybe he has."

* * *

"I loved her."  
"You loved her?" I heard someone spit from the doorway of the living room. I turned around and looked at her - Sophie.  
Harry didn't respond. "Maybe you should go Sop-" she intruded before I could even finish "NO! I will not go, don't fucking tell me what to do. My boyfriend just said he loved someone else, that hurts... deep." Her words were so fake and patronising, I wanted to be sick.  
"Our friend just died, what do you expect us to do, confess our hatred towards her?" I rolled my eyes, "Please Sophie, just go, you guys can discuss it later?" Harry looked from me to her and then back at the ground.  
"No" she stormed into the room and stood right in front of Harry, staring him out, "we're sorting it out now."  
He looked up at her. "Well?" she spat.  
"There's nothing to say really," he shrugged.  
She shook her head, sticking her tongue into the bottom of her cheek, "Oh really? Nothing to say, we'll see about that." She scoffed and marched outside.  
"What's she doing?" Harry raised an eyebrow watching through the window. I shrugged, "God only knows." I watched her fumble about in her pockets as she found a key. Oh dear, I could tell where this was going. Harry shot up off the sofa and ran outside. I decided it would be best for me to stay here.

* * *

_"Parties. That's one thing I'll miss. Although, not all parties are great. People get drunk, things happen, they regret it. I went to a party once, terrible things happened. You remember, don't you Helen?"_ Everyone's eyes moved from the screen back to me. Yes, I knew exactly what she was talking about.

* * *

The bass pulsated through my body, the music was so loud and it was giving me a headache. I sauntered up the stairs, trying hard to keep my balance as I had consumed enough alcohol to get me tipsy. It seemed empty upstairs, unusual for a party but then I heard familiar voices in the bedroom to my right. They were shouting at eachother, the door was open a little bit and I curiously looked inside, leaning against a wall; Katie and Liam. I sipped on my drink, I'm a lightweight, I get drunk easily, I knew fine well my blood was drowning in alcohol by this point. Although I was drunk, I still had a brain. Katie had been cheating on Liam with Harry for a while and he had just found out. Their argument was getting intense and the yelling was getting louder, I was struggling not to interfere and stick up for my friend or at least keep the peace. I knew she liked Liam but she never really loved him, she loved Harry, she always had and she finally got the chance to be with him and she took it, grabbed it while it was there. I told her not to, to at least wait to break things off with Liam but she didn't listen, she never does. I heard a thump and whipped my head to peer through the door. He had her right up against the wall... what happened next wasn't pretty. I downed the rest of my drink trying to forget what I had seen and heard, Liam came out of the room and we locked eyes. I could tell he knew that I knew what had just happened.

When Liam and I finally broke off that awful, painful stare I wandered down the hall and into the bedroom. Katie was sitting in the corner, she was pretty shaken up. I sat down next to her. Silence. I suppose I couldn't really say anything but I don't think anything I would've said would've helped anyway. I just sat there, letting her know I was there for her, I think thats what she needed; reassurance. I gave her a quick hug and whispered "I'm sorry" I should've stopped it from happening... why didn't I? I stood up, offering a hand but she shook her head. "No thanks." Shit.

I walked down the hall and into the party, well staggered really, but not from the alcohol; from everything that had happened. I grabbed for the piano in the living room and then the piano bench and I sat, ignoring everyone around me. I wanted to leave but I couldn't. Something was stopping me. Where would I go? I couldn't go home, not yet. And, wherever I went how could I get there? Liam was meant to be my lift... I didn't really want to go with him anymore. I couldn't walk either, my house was so far away. I didn't know how I was going to get home. The only thing I knew for certain was that I wanted to get out of there and not think about anything or anyone anymore. Then, a hand touched my shoulder, a gentle squeeze.


	4. Chapter 3

Then, a hand touched my shoulder, a gentle squeeze. I looked up to see who it was.  
"Helen," he grinned. A smile couldn't help but appear on my face. "You alright," he nodded his head slightly as if to say he wanted me to move along the stool so he could join me. I scooted over and he sat down. I shrugged "yeah, you?"  
He frowned and studied my face, "Whats wrong?" What was I meant to say? One of his friends just attacked Katie because he found out she was cheating with **his** best friend Harry? I froze, thinking whether or not to tell him. I chose not to. Stupid, I know but Liam was my friend too and I didn't want him to get in trouble.  
"Nothing," I smiled. Lies.  
He tilted his head, "If you're sure.." I smiled and nodded, "thanks!"  
"No problem," he grinned. I bit my lip and looked around, I could feel Louis' eyes pretty much burning into me, studying everything I did. Drunk people, everywhere. Bex was pretty much lying on top of Niall who was out of it, on the sofa. Ayesha was sprawled out on the floor, KO'd. Zayn was sucking face with some girl in the year below. Gross. I screwed up my face in disgust and I knew for sure I wanted to leave.  
"Do you want to go somewhere?"  
I raised my eyebrows and looked at him. He chuckled slightly, "Don't worry not like that, I just mean to get out of here."  
"Yeah, okay." I nodded and smiled. He stood up and reached his arm out to help me and I accepted.  
I staggered along beside him as we left the party. I can't lie, I was pretty relieved about not having to be in there with a bunch of drunk people. Although, me, myself, was quite intoxicated.  
"You look really nice tonight," he smiled as we waited for a taxi. I couldn't help but smile, I'm pretty sure I looked like an idiot with the goofiest grin .  
"Shut up," I laughed and hit his arm gently.  
"I'm serious!" he protested as the taxi arrived and we jumped in.  
"Well, thanks" I smiled and sat down next to him. "you're not too bad yourself," I giggled. Ew, giggled... that's so cringey. What was wrong with me? Shut up Helen. By this point, I had totally forgotten what I had witnessed earlier on that night.  
He smirked and then winked, "I get that a lot." I rolled my eyes.  
"Oh, charming!"

The taxi stopped and I undid my seat belt.  
"Wait, let me help," Louis got out of the car and opened the door as I hobbled out.  
"Thanks," I smiled, "you don't need to! My house is just there!" I laughed.  
"Well, I don't want you falling over now," he looked me up and down.  
I leant my hand on his shoulder as he dipped down to help me walk. Did he think I was paralyzed or something? There was nothing wrong, I could walk perfectly! When we got to the door step, I struggled to get my key in the door.  
"Let me get that for you," he laughed and placed his hand over mine to unlock the door.  
"Thanks Lou," I grinned and stepped inside.  
"No problem," he dug his hands into his pockets. I turned around and looked at him for a second. There was silence for a minute but it wasn't awkward really.  
"Well I better go, the taxi man will get a bit pissed," he chuckled. I bit my lip and looked at the taxi and then back at him.  
"Y-you can stay if you want..."  
He looked at me and didn't answer. Well done Helen, make it awkward why don't you?  
"I mean it saves you paying more and you've helped me tonight! There's no one home anyway so you won't be bothering anyone," I quickly blurted out, turning red. I must've sounded like such an idiot.  
"Yeah sure, if thats okay," he smiled.

* * *

Bex got up and paused the tape. "What's she talking about?" she looked at me puzzled. I had never said a word of what happened up until this day. Why didn't I? I should've protected my friend not spent the night with a boy... the image of her scared eyes burnt into my mind. I was such a bitch.  
"Yeah, what's she talking about?" Louis frowned. I couldn't even look at him.  
"Liam..." I whisped  
"Oh shut up about Liam, he's not missing, just tell us what happened!" Ayesha sounded really frustrated.  
"No, I mean, Liam... he hit her." The room turned silent, you would hear a pin drop.  
"You what?" Zayn spoke up.  
"You heard..." I stared at the telly.  
"And you didn't think to tell anyone?" Harry spat. I shook my head. "You absolute idiot!"  
"I'm sorry, alright. I didn't want Liam to get in tro-"  
"You watched Katie get hit and all you could think about was Liam getting in trouble? You seriously have lost it, Helen" Bex snapped.  
"I'm sorry, I regret it and if I could change it I would, you don't even understand" I babbled.  
"Oh I understand perfectly," Harry looked at me disgusted. "I'm going," he stood up.  
"Yeah, I think I'll join you," Niall didn't even look at me. They both picked up their jackets and opened my bedroom door, looking at everyone to see who would go with them.  
"Guys, don't, please.." I croaked.  
"Nah, maybe you can feel how she felt," Harry rolled his eyes.  
Bex and Zayn followed. That left just me, Ayesha and Louis.  
"Guys, I'm so sorry" I felt so shit.  
"Nothing can be done now, don't worry too much" Ayesha smiled weakly.


End file.
